1 Tip for Success – Hold Yourself Accountable

September 26, 2013

~by Haley Lynn Gray~


So many times in life, it’s easy to blame other things for failure.  It is quite possible to come up with thousands of reasons that you fail, when the real reason is looking you in the mirror.  That means you have to take charge of yourself, and hold yourself accountable.  What exactly do I mean by that?  In fact, if you’re going to be a leader, you by definition are going to be out in front, so you need to be setting the rules, and holding yourself to them.



In this picture, I was swimming in a meet. Frequently, I was the only girl in my age group at practice, yet I kept at it until I won two Gold medals at the state swim meet, my senior year in High school. I held myself accountable to my own goals for improvement.


Hold Yourself Accountable

  • Set Goals.  You can’t exactly hold yourself accountable for anything if you don’t know what you’re doing it for.
  • Figure out what went wrong when things go wrong, and how you specifically contributed to that.  What do I mean?  Usually when you don’t get the results you’re working on, there is a reason.  It may be political, it may be something you did.  What did you do, and what didn’t you do to contribute to the situation?  For women in particular, it may be that we’ve failed to place enough weight on business relationships and developing those relationships.  You can’t succeed at a game if you don’t figure out what the game is, and what the rules are.  Try picking up a soccer ball and carrying it down the field, and see just how far that gets you.
  • Ensure you are making progress towards your goals. A goal without an action plan is a wish.  I wish I could run a marathon.  Realistically, I’m not in any physical shape to do so.  Simply working out a couple of times per week is not going to be sufficient to get me to that goal, since I am so out of shape.  That means that I either need to adjust the goal, or face the fact that I’m not going to reach that goal.  Wishing and burying my head in the sand won’t work.  Neither will those things make me lose weight, get magically fit, or get my current companies up and running.
  • What other people think really doesn’t matter.  I can set goals for others all day long.  They can try to set goals for me, and tell me how I should live my life.  as long as I’m not breaking any laws, behaving unethically, or immorally, I don’t really care what they think.  I can’t control their thoughts and actions, but I sure can control my own.  I’m not going to give someone else the control over me by giving them that leverage.  Neither should you.  You are answerable to God, and to yourself.  Then your spouse, children, parents, and boss, in that order. But as you go down the list, they should have progressively less hold on you.
  • Go easy on yourself.   I’ll admit that I’m a type A.  I work hard, play hard, and try to achieve some crazy goals.  Mostly, I do achieve what I set out to achieve.  I also know when to cut myself some slack.  I had the goal of starting work on my companies sooner, and registering for Tae-Kwon-Do classes sooner.  Honestly, I realize that dealing with my dad’s failing health and subsequent death put a delay on that.  I am willing to give myself a little bit of space to breathe- just a little bit.  You should give yourself that time too.  Be kind to yourself, but be realistic.  You are the best person to be kind to yourself, after all, you live in your own head all the time.

What do you think about holding yourself accountable?  How do you hold yourself accountable?


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Meet the Author: Haley Lynn Gray

Haley-Lynn-Gray__IMG_2025-compressorHaley helps female entrepreneurs create a strategy plan for their businesses – so they can make enough money to spend quality time with their family, pay for their children’s dance lessons, pay bills – and not worry about where the next client is coming from.

Haley is a serial entrepreneur and founder of Leadership Girl. She helps other entrepreneurs build their businesses by sharing the benefits of her business education and experience through Business Coaching.

Whether you want to get a new business off the ground or expand an existing business, Haley can assist you.

Connect with Haley:


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