~by Haley Lynn Gray~
Quit hiding. I mean you, me, and almost every other woman running a business.
We’re remarkably good at it — burying achievements, mentioning the business apologetically, and describing years of work as “oh, just a little thing I do.” Because it isn’t ladylike to talk about yourself, and nobody wants to look like they’re showing off.
It costs more than you think.
What hiding actually costs
People can’t hire you for something they don’t know you did. The client who needed exactly your expertise went elsewhere because they never found out you had it.
You can’t be referred. Someone can only say your name if they know what to say about you.
And the credit goes elsewhere. Work nobody attributes to you gets absorbed into the team, the agency, or the louder person in the room.
The distinction that helps
Showing off is talking about yourself for your own benefit. Telling people what you do is giving them information they need in order to hire you or recommend you.
They aren’t the same thing, and women systematically mistake the second for the first.
Nobody ever thinks a man mentioning his business is showing off. He’s networking.
How to do it without cringing
State facts, not adjectives. “I’ve run three businesses and sold two” is a fact. “I’m an incredible entrepreneur” is an adjective, and adjectives are where the discomfort lives.
Frame it as usefulness. “I work with law firms on this specific problem” is information, not a boast.
Share the work, not the praise. The finished project, the result, the thing you learned — visibility is showing the work rather than announcing your excellence.
Have one sentence ready. Who you help and what you fix, said the same way every time, until it stops feeling odd.
And accept compliments with “thank you.” Full stop. No deflection, no crediting luck, no listing everyone else involved.
The awards, features and speaking slots
All decided by who put themselves forward. Nobody is scanning the region for quietly excellent women to reward.
Apply anyway — for the award, the panel, the podcast, the feature. The worst outcome is a no.
And do it for other women
The easiest version of this: say someone else’s accomplishment out loud when she won’t.
“She’s being modest — she built that entire programme.” It costs nothing and it’s the thing women get least of.
Stop hiding. You did the work; let people know it exists.
