How to Change Your Thoughts, Change Your Life

"How to Change Your Thoughts, Change Your Life" Businesswoman Sitting Outdoors Graphic

~by Debbie Jacobs~

Change your thoughts, change your life. I heard this from Louise Hay in 2010 and decided to turn it into a Change Your Thoughts, Change Your Life challenge.

Yes, I committed to seeing if this statement rang true. I was an extremely negative thinker. My perspective was always, “the glass is half empty.” I habitually came from a place of “no.” Sarcasm was my best friend and fear was my constant companion. And where did this come from? Where else, my conditioning. My childhood, though perceptibly privileged, was predominantly negative. At the age of 39, I was unhappy, working the corporate grind, attracting bad times, in toxic relationships, and not living the life I had imagined.

So I set out to get my mind straight. If our thoughts create our reality — and this was the reality my thoughts had created — then I got to work creating new positive thoughts for a new reality of happiness, love, success and family. But boy, this was not easy. First, I had to get a handle on the negative thoughts already running amok on auto-pilot. This is known as “the monkey mind.” What was easy was stopping the negative self-talk. No more “stupid me” or ”I’m such a jerk” if something didn’t go right. No more negative self-talk about my looks or my weight, no more beating myself up, no more negative self-talk at all, in any way, not even in jest or jokes. I was rather surprised at how easy it was to stop this longstanding habitual behavior and how quickly this behavior pattern became a faded memory, one that has not returned. I reminded myself of this accomplishment many times as it took years to feel I gained control of my mind and the subconscious and, at times, thought that would be impossible and would never happen. I stuck with the challenge to “change your thoughts, change your life” with unwavering determination. My commitment was to stop the negative thinking. And to clean out my system of negativity, which was deeply rooted in my conditioning, like you would clean water of contaminates. My goal was to be positive, cleansed of all the negativity in my thinking.

Essentially, I trained my mind to stop the negative thoughts as soon as they arose, to nip them in the bud, and not engage the thought or start ruminating on a negative situation. I followed a simple cardinal rule: If the thought was negative, switch the thought like changing the TV channel. I was absolute in my discipline. And the important thing was to replace the negative thought with a positive, productive thought or affirmation. The mind likes and needs to be occupied and will choose thoughts, regardless if they serve you or not. Training the mind to think about subjects you choose is absolutely necessary for accomplishing your goals and living the life of your dreams. I also had to train my mind to see the good in situations, to look for the good because the default was to see the bad, the negative. I used my childhood to practice, and searched for all good memories. Changing my mindset to positivity took a huge effort at the beginning, was forced for a long time, and then one day became automatic. My perspective and mindset had shifted!

Using the My Inner Voice app I developed made the shift that much easier, but all it takes is unwavering commitment. When my sweet little dog peed on my vision board I knew the change had an impact. Old me would have been upset, mad, “she ruined it,” etc., but new positive-thinking me accepted the accident as my dog’s way of including herself on my vision board and it still hangs on my wall with her special touch included. For me, this was a big sign of progress.

Thinking positively releases the emotional burden that goes along with negative thoughts; we deal with much less emotional upset when we think positively.


How to Change Your Thoughts, Change Your Life 1

Debbie Jacobs

Meet the Author: Debbie Jacobs

Debbie is a positivity mindset, transformational life coach, focusing on success and happiness. She’s been a certified Heal Your Life Workshop Leader, based on Louise Hay’s teachings, and is currently pursuing certification from the Napoleon Hill Foundation. Debbie studies the many principles of Universal Law and teaches alignment as fundamental happiness practices. Debbie is also a LifeSprings/Mastery graduate and developed the My Inner Voice App, designed exclusively for her coaching programs. For more information, visit her “My Inner Voice app page” on Facebook.

If this resonates, you don’t have to figure it out alone.
We host small, thoughtful Round Table conversations inside Women’s Entrepreneur Network where women leaders talk through exactly this kind of challenge.
You’re welcome to join us.

Related Posts

How to Stop Feeling Behind All the Time

How to Stop Feeling Behind All the Time

Behind what? It's worth actually answering, because the feeling of being behind requires a schedule — and there isn't one. Nobody issued a timetable for how large your business should be by now, or what you should be earning in year four, or when you were...

The Myth of “Having It All Figured Out”

The Myth of “Having It All Figured Out”

Every business owner I know is improvising more than they admit. Not the whole thing. But a meaningful portion of any given week is worked out on the spot, by someone who did not know the answer when the question arrived. The reason this feels like a personal failing...

Leadership Isn’t Confidence — It’s Clarity

Leadership Isn’t Confidence — It’s Clarity

The advice is everywhere: be more confident. Project certainty. Walk in like you belong there. It's aimed at the wrong thing. Confidence is about your internal state. Your team is not experiencing your internal state — they're experiencing whether they know what...

Leading Without Losing Yourself

Leading Without Losing Yourself

"Losing yourself" in a business usually gets treated as a scheduling problem — too many hours, not enough boundaries, take a holiday. That's part of it. The harder version is that the job changes who you are, and a good deal of that change is necessary. You...

The Best Advice I Ever Got From a Mentor

The Best Advice I Ever Got From a Mentor

~by Haley Lynn Gray~ The best advice a mentor ever gave me was simple: lean into who you really are, and what brings you joy. It sounds soft. It turned out to be one of the most practical pieces of business advice I've ever received. Why it was hard to hear I'm an...

Leadership Lessons I Learned from My Children

Leadership Lessons I Learned from My Children

~by Haley Lynn Gray~ I have four children, and they've taught me more about leading people than most of the management books on my shelf. Not through anything dramatic. Through the ordinary, daily business of trying to get other human beings to do things — and...

Find what you need

Lead Your Team

Delegation, hiring, difficult conversations, and becoming the boss you'd want to work for.

Build the Business

Pricing, launching, systems, and building something that doesn't depend on you.

Women in Leadership

Negotiation, the pay gap, and what the research actually says about women who lead.

Get Seen

Being visible without the cringe — podcasts, content, and being remembered.

Lead Yourself

Courage, your inner critic, time, and protecting what matters most.

You're Not Alone

The loneliness of leading, and why the best owners don't solve everything alone.